Billy Ray, how the worm turns...

You know, some time back during the First Great Miley Cyrus Is Ruining Civilization flapdoodle, I stumbled across a slightly heartbreaking interview with Billy Ray Cyrus. Maybe Chris Heath just penned the most undeservedly sympathetic article ever and should be awarded the Pulitzer, or maybe it was partly because Billy Ray's a fellow Kentuckian who seemed genuinely grateful and even humble about his fame, plus he never took himself that seriously. He did not pretend to be an ar-teeste. I think I also realized after reading an insider's perspective on why child stars so often go off the rails that having a child with any measure of fame must be a parent's worst nightmare, because your child has become a moneymaking commodity for a heartless industry that will not hesitate to discard them like so much trash once they no longer turn a profit.

But now he's capitalizing on the Second Great Miley Cyrus Is Ruining Civilization[1] flapdoodle by appearing  in an entirely cringeworthy video [2] featuring a remake of Achy Breaky Heart. Sort of. Kind of a reboot/sequel/remix thing. It's mostly inoffensive as a musical endeavor, no worse than most music, anyway, but the video is a whole other level of offensive that includes a shoutout to Miley's twerking and features a large number of women dressed in, essentially, tiny strips of electrical tape. There's Billy Ray happily appearing in a video where a fellow performer proudly proclaims "Miley keeps twerking, Daddy’s song is working". I may have gagged at this point. I almost missed Billy Ray shouting, "Wrecking Ball!”

I think they'll have to invent a new level of infernal torment for the parent who can give the impression that he's worried about the people exploiting his teenage daughter then turn right around and exploit her name for the sake of his own career.

[1] - Or, I dunno, one of them. I'm losing count.

[2]- I take no responsibility for the fact that you cannot unsee this. Watch at your own risk. Maybe have bucket handy if you read that interview with that sensitive, caring dad character who admitted he hadn't been the world's best disciplinarian but worried about the welfare of his little girl. And some people claim Billy Ray can't act...

P.S.

Ew. Nasty.

The Continuing Saga Of People Signing Me Up For Things

For some reason, people seem to really enjoy signing up for stuff with my email address. In the past, I've had some random woman's Home Depot credit card emails, a Lord Of The Rings MMO account and a Box.com account associated with my email. I assume it's mostly not malicious, just... typos, but honestly, I can't take chances.

So I do what any self-respecting person would do these days. I grab the account and take control of it without prejudice. People seem to have been very  busy signing me up for amusing things this weekend, as I've got not one, not two, but three new email-related things I didn't acquire myself!

And man, are they random.

One signed me up for Habbo Hotel, a Finnish social site that seems to consist entirely of buying stuff for your fictional character and chatting with people while wandering around virtual hotel rooms. User lsweetcoke, who seems fond of the pirate-y eyepatch look, since their (my?) character has one,  might be surprised to find that I've changed the password, activated the extra-secure security questions and that it will be verrrrry difficult to guess the answers as I doubt they share my third grade teacher and even if they researched it somehow, what random collection of letters I stuck in front of the answer. And I've turned off any setting that allows you to be "social", like receiving friend requests or having your profile viewed. Oh, and I changed the email address the account is associated with for good measure. At any rate, if you're lsweetcoke and would like to explain how/why you came to associate your account with my email address, explanations are welcome. Also, why an eyepatch? I mean, it's not as though I have anything against eyepatches, some of my favorite fictional characters have worn them, at least briefly, but is it what all the hip Finnish teens are wearing today? Inquiring minds want to know.

This looks... um... whimsically delicious. I'll take my picnics non-virtual, please, potential cyber-suitors. And remember, no hiding in the locker and freaking out the rubber ducky, creepers!

Someone else decided I needed to join the exciting world of Tumblr! So now that Tumblr is mine, and I've changed the URL from maria101-me.tumblr.com to something I might use. Anyway, again, random Tumblr-person, if you would like to offer an explanation, I'm all virtual ears. I mean, I'm just wondering how, with the name "Maria" you managed to mistype your own email address that badly. 

But I'm picturing something like this. 

I would love to properly credit this minor work of gif-tastic genius, but it came from Tumblr. I think. How the heck do you ever manage to credit any image from Tumblr when you found it on Google Image Search? Tumblr is like one massive tornado of liking and reblogging. You can never find a thing a second time unless you reblog it, based on my past experience. And apparently, you also can't find it a first time, either. Tumblr. It's like that one drawer in your house where small, unorganized things go to disappear permanently. That's one reason why I've avoided actually joining.

An additional person, I presume, decided I simply HAD to get the specials from Strawberrynet.com. Now, that one appears to be just a newsletter containing specials as opposed to an actual login, which saved me the trouble of having to swoop in and take it back for myself. Mind, this may only be because the site doesn't actually have logins. Otherwise, I would fully expect to be logging into your account and cancelling your orders for you. So, thank you, kind cosmetics-buying sir or madam for only making me unsubscribe!

Anyone else thinking of using my email address to sign up for random stuff, skip it, please. I can't even keep up with all the junk I actually sign into. I'm sure as heck not going to play your Sim knock-off and reblog all the things for you. And I'm sure not going to be buying your direct from Hong Kong cosmetics for you.